the panic attack

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have you ever been so overwhelmed with life and work that you want to curl up in a ball and forget all your responsibilities and pretend like everything is going to get done anyway?

okay, well, have you ever actually¬†curled up in ball and desperately tried to wish away everything you had to do? because that’s what happened to me this past weekend.

there is a lot going on in Veritas right now because God is trying to show us that He’s all “crazy awesome” and “has way bigger plans than we do.” [no blaspheming intended, i think God understands my sarcasm] seriously, we’ve had baptisms, sending 19 people to brazil in less than TWO WEEKS, 95 students going on our first ever spring retreat this weekend, an upcoming women’s retreat and more.

i admit that i’ve been waaaahayyyyy overwhelmed with it all. there has just been so much to do and so little time. last week felt completely nutso busy and yet i left on friday at 5pm with so much undone. i said to myself, “i’ll work on this at home, and then i’ll just go in and print everything.” and then…

then, i proceeded to FREAK OUT about everything that i still had to do and i handled it by curling up in a ball, watching insane amounts of tv and profusely asking bryan to not talk to me about anything i should or shouldn’t be doing. i did this until 8pm on Saturday, because i had thankfully watched every episode of “New Girl.” after that, i was out of things to distract me from everything i had to have done for sunday.

so, i slipped my laptop in my bag, and went to the church offices, at 8pm on a saturday night. what can i say? i work best under pressure. the following is a true account of my saturday night adrenaline-filled work hours, for your enjoyment [because i know you read this blog for my crazy]

7:56pm: arrive at offices, lock the door behind me
7:57pm: turn on hall lights, my office light, and copy room light
7:59pm: put dishes away, break a glass (shoot!), get a glass of water
8:02pm: open up the laptop, turn on local natives pandora station, dance a little, start working
8:34pm: find myself dancing as i cross things off my huge to-do list, i started with easy things like ordering a new address stamp and a paper folder
9:15pm: i’m reminded of the bubbles jenny tokheim left for us, and i blow some for fun. it makes me happy
11:47pm: clint comes into the offices to get some things for sunday morning, asks me if anyone got towels for the baptisms tomorrow, i add that to my to-do list
12:05am: i think i’m almost done, and then i remember 4 other things i should do
1:26am: i head to walmart so i won’t have to in the morning, oh wait, it already is the morning
1:47am: i check-out at walmart with 19 pocket journals, 2 handsoaps, 4 lanyards, and 4 luxury towels. i’m sure the check-out lady was judging my weird purchases, but on the positive side, the night shift employees are much nicer than the day-shift employees.
1:53am: arrive home, not tired at all, write some blogs, go to bed

the moral of the story is, i’m crazy, but everything is done. success.