‘member that time my grandma tried to get my grandpa to stop smoking (after he had been for 50 years)? ‘member how she thought the best way to do that was to put handwritten notes underneath his clear ashtray so that he’d be immediately convicted to stop right then and there? 


my favorite thing she wrote on one of them was a bible verse about the second coming or something and her words below it:


“think about that!”




[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time when me and my bff got to go on vacation together? ‘member how we kept ourselves busy by arguing about who’s hair was fine or coarse and counting all the “cow’s toilet paper?” what? you don’t know what cow’s toilet paper is?

it’s that giant “roll” of hay/grass. duh. we counted over 200 easily.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

much like my funnygirl idol, i’m running low on ‘member that times. i think i’m going to call it quits on the weekly posts after july. but don’t worry, the hilarity will continue with the long-awaited (by me mostly) “you know you live in a trailer park when…” series!

‘member that time i played softball? and enrolled in jazz and ballet classes? and took a golf lesson? and gymnastics? and volleyball?

really?! you remember that? because i’ve blocked those out completely.

maybe because i always wanted to quit halfway through the season, three of those sports made me cry, and i peed my pants (or leotard, if you will) in at least one.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time when i was a kid and i hated lima beans but my mom made me eat them anyway? so, ‘member how that one time, i got really smart and just threw my lima beans on the floor under the table when my mom wasn’t looking? just like the kids did on tv?

too bad we didn’t have a dog.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time when my husband looked closely at my face and said, “whoa, you really would have a unibrow if you didn’t pluck your eyebrows!”

yeah, i know. 

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

hey guys, ‘member that time i went to camp with my church and i peed my pants on the floor because i was laughing so hard?

‘member how i was so embarassed but everyone thought it was hilarious and somehow everyone in my cabin started this inside joke that a frog had peed on the floor even though it was me? and ‘member how all week we kept saying, the frog peed in our cabin! and giggled like crazy?

thank the Good Lord for nice church girls.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time i went to a movie?

‘member how after the movie i went to my car and realized i locked my keys inside? ‘member how i called bryan to bring me my spare key and while i was waiting i noticed that the car next to mine was running? ‘member how after i looked around for the owner and thought of ways i could let the owner of the car know i realized it was my car that was running? and that not only had i locked my keys in the car, but that i had left my car running during the entire movie.

good thing it wasn’t lotr or something.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time when i tripped up the stairs at my church, fell flat on my face, rolled over into an folded, upright table, knocked it over and was crushed, face-first, underneath of it?

‘member how my forehead just kind-of popped open and was gushing blood everywhere and i had to get 17 stitches on my face?

good thing i have bangs.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time when my mom called my father-in-law white trash? to his face?! the first time they met?!

yeah, that was hilarious.

note: no in-law relationships were damaged in this ‘member that time.

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]

‘member that time i got married to my best ever friend exactly two years ago? ‘member how i bawled my eyes out like the entire time?

‘member how i was so disoriented and happy after the wedding that as we were dismissing our guests i was congratulating them?

yeah, that was freakin’ cute.

happy anniversary to me!!!!

[it’s ‘member that time monday at the van voorst‘s blog!]